"A lot of times with grief, it's not that you can plan what to avoid and what to go to. Memories can ambush you. And you get used to that. The plans and contingencies I make don't matter. This thing is going to have its way with me one way or another." Patton Oswalt
http://www.vulture.com/2017/10/patton-oswalt-interview-on-death-grief-michelle-mcnamara.html